The Vitamin Incentive

Four out of five work days, Matt slips a little packet of vitamins hand-wrapped in foil in my bag. There they lie in neglect, woefully forgotten, until I discover the mushy wads caked to the bottom of the bag when I clean it out. (Mushy because I do a lot of walking in the rain without an umbrella. Can’t manage umbrellas: too much tension and metal sticks and little latches that pinch fingers. Also, having one’s umbrella turn inside out in the wind is embarrassing, but shouldn’t be, and that makes me mad. I’d rather save my occasions of personal embarrassment for things that I did in public on purpose but regret, or when I tell someone that I have Vanilla Ice’s cell phone number and they remain unimpressed).

Anyway! Occasionally I’ll remember to remove the vitamin packets from my bag and put them on my work desk, where they continue to remain un-swallowed, partially hiding under a fluttery sea of yellow post-its, weirding out my colleagues.

It took a little while, but Matt got wise to the vitamin graveyard in my bag a few weeks ago when he was rooting around for the car keys. First he got a little mad (and his “a little mad” is like seeing one teensy cloud during a sunny day), and then he got smart. Smart in this case means he sends e-mails with jokes and pictures as reminders to take the vitamins.  Unsurprising to both of us, it turns out I respond well to jokes and pictures. My omega-3 levels have never been higher.

Here for your viewing pleasure: select images from The Vitamin Incentive.

Starting Off the New Year… 8 Days Late

Decreasing procrastination is a lost and dusty cause on my list of New Year’s Resolutions, which reveals itself below as an amalgamation of annually recycled vows and a few new ones to freshen things up. I don’t feel bad about being eight days late for a number of reasons, a notable one being that on a recent work trip I survived America’s own autobahn.  Have you ever traversed the roads outside of downtown Detroit?  Along with a rich automobile culture, the residents seem to possess the innate knowledge of how to cross five lanes of traffic cruising at an easy 90 MPH to reach a left lane exit within 4.67 seconds. I thought I’d been exposed to a lot in New York drivers (aggressive, offensive, but reasonable), Boston drivers (aggressive, offensive, reverses down one-ways, entirely unreasonable), and suburbs of Philadelphia drivers (distracted, SUVs, meandering). Everywhere else I’ve been didn’t really seem to have its own breed. But Detroit, you proved me wrong.  Not only can your residents drive, but they can drive well at ridiculously high speeds.  And they aren’t all on cell phones. So hats off, and thanks for your patience when my rented Chevy Aveo could’t push past 60 without shaking.

For the resolutions, the main impetus behind posting them is to be held accountable. Usually they end up scribbled on the back page of an old notebook which I come across in late September of that year, sheepish but unsurprised 1.5 to 2 of them saw accomplishment. But now here they are, in electronic black and white. The pursuit of this year’s resolutions will hopefully spur additional posts that at least one of two of my sisters (are you still reading? Please still be reading!) will find interesting.

2012 New Years Resolutions
More greens, grains, fish oil, yoga (or at least consistent stretching)
Find a charity we really like and learn about/support it
Get through the documentary list on Netflix
Take advantage of the gym’s group classes and also learn how to do a proper squat
Re-grout the tub (this has been needed for so long it definitely makes the list)
Make a suitable sourdough starter
Make sauerkraut
Make and age some cheese
More live music (these gentlemen look promising)
Buy a lemon tree and bring it to fruition (haHA!)
Plan our trip to Italy
Get clothing tailored
Write letters instead of e-mails where applicable
Other stuff
Other stuff
Other stuff
…Decrease procrastination