Happy Birthday, or, Good Things Come In Ugly Packages

What do you get when you mix a deeply embedded streak of laziness with a dash of wrapping paper abhorrence and a pinch of frugality?

I suppose that combination could produce any number of results, but believe me when I say that one of them is this:

What you see above is an earth-conscious reuse of material with a rustic-chic embellishment, resulting in a manly presentation for the Mr.’s birthday gift.  In other words, I wrapped his present in the crumpled brown paper it was shipped in and then tied the whole lumpy mess up with a measure of kitchen twine usually reserved for looping around chicken legs. Happy Birthday, Love of My Life!!!

Here’s my issue with wrapping paper. You buy a 17 foot tall tube of the stuff which goes out of its way to launch itself at you every time you go in the closet for the boots or umbrellas.  You spend 20 minutes wrangling it around some unshapely object, unless you’re one of those people who gives hardback books (in which case, you are way smarter than me).  One side does the envelope-fold thing neatly, the other stone cold refuses so you hack it with scissors and then it’s too short so you’re forced to cut an extra teeny square to tape over the gap.  Then the whole wrap job gets ripped open, often within 10 minutes of being crafted.  Follow this with one of life’s biggest dilemmas – throw away the shreds, laden with a measure of guilt in direct proportion to the amount of space in a landfill that the discarded wrapping paper will create, or gingerly fold the remains and put them in a drawer, knowing in the cockles of your heart that you’ll never reuse them?

Alright, maybe not one of life’s biggest, or even smallest, dilemmas, but I really wanted to use the word “cockles” in an unexpected context.

I actually do like wrapping paper, but I can’t be bothered to pay for it, and I don’t have the foresight to buy it after the holidays when it’s 50% off and use it the next year. Plus, as evidenced above, I’m a really bad wrapper.

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